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Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Canoe.ca and Slam Sports Promote Hatred of Atlantic Canada

I’d like, no in fact I need, to take a few minutes to comment on a very disturbing article today on the Canoe.ca Slam-Sports web site. The commentary is entitled “The Last Word” by one Bill Lankhof, or as I would prefer to call him at this point, Bill F-Off. Mr. Lankhof works for a publication out of Toronto which I will not name directly since I would prefer to give the particular rag in question as little free publicity as possible.

It is clear to me and should be to any other thinking person that this individual is nothing more than an ignorant, uneducated, self serving pustule who has never traveled outside of his own little fiefdom (possibly within his own mind, but more likely someplace in central Canada).

In what should have been a very celebratory sports article describing the Brad Gushue Olympic trial victory on Sunday in Halifax, this micro-minded waste of oxygen managed to insult the province of Newfoundland and Labrador at least 6 times and still managed some space to throw in a crude comment about the sinking of the titanic for good measure.

Let me give you an example of the pure crapulance he was allowed to bring to the public in his attack on Newfoundland.

Lankhof's first insult lead off the article when he began the piece by saying the win was the biggest thing to happen in Newfoundland, “since the invention of pogey”. He then followed up with such wonderful insights as, “The local sport of baby –seal whacking is no longer coming across on TV as a great spectator sport” and noting how Newfoundland’s Gushue was a good fit for curling since he came from a land of “Booze, ice and rocks”.

As if this were'nt bad enough, he didn’t stop there. He then went on to say, “Locals now have something to chew the fat over --other than that yucky whale blubber they've been gnawing on…”.

I have no idea where his narrow mind, if he even has a mind, managed to dig that little ditty up, nor do I understand why he would follow such a remark with, “Newfies finally have someone named Skip to look up to again whose livelihood doesn't depend on a cod fish to be born later.”

To top it all off, in the warped mind of this lump of useless organs, it appears that crude references to the titanic sinking, where hundreds of souls were lost, are considered a funny thing. He says, and I quote, “The last time Newfoundland made such a big international splash the Titanic tried deep-sea diving”.

I ask you, is this idiot supposed to be a sports writer, or is he simply trying to take the wind out of the sails of this world class team while intentionally insulting, denigrating and stereotyping a large part of the Canadian population?

This man, and I use the term very loosely, not to mention the latte sipping morons who keep him on their payroll need to take a long hard look at reality. They might just find that there is much more of value to be found in Canada than exists in their own backyard.

It is this kind of crude and degrading commentary that has long made Atlantic Canadians, and Newfoundlander's in particular, feel like outcasts in this Country. For an organization like Canoe.ca to provide this individual with a forum for spewing his hatred is nothing less than an embarrassment to the management and staff of that company.

I'm sure many Newfoundlanders and Labradoreans who have read the article will be asking for an official apology. I as an individual will not. Not because I don't feel that we deserve one, but because an apology will simply not rectify a very serious problem like the one his paper and anyone else who would promote his drivel has. Instead this man should be fired, along with anyone who would dare to defend his comments. Then again, I guess that's a lot to ask from a company that would hire this excuse for a human being in the first place.

Maybe I'll do my part to help the stereotype of Newfoundland along by dashing off to Toronto and getting a job. Maybe I too can be a sports writer. I understand there is a certain paper there that will hire anyone with a head full of rocks. Let me see, how about if I start by following Bill Lankhof's lead. Maybe the next time someone like Chris Brosh of the Raptors has a great night I can amuse myself and my readers by talking about all the fried chicken and watermelon that will be consumed at the after game party.

No, I don't think I'd like a job like that. I'd probably need to be at least two people to carry it off because one person certainly couldn't be that much of a moron all by himself.


no longer proud said...

How many more examples of bigotry and hatred do NL'ians need directed toward us before enough realize we're not wanted in this excuse for a country??? Sadly though, from everything I've seen it seems to me that too many are willing to take the abuse as long as Ottawa keeps sending them cheques for this and cheques for that... What happens when our resources are finally stripped away completely and the cheques stop coming and we're still the target of such abuses and bigotry? Are temporary perks and handouts from the feds worth an entire people's dignity? Apparently so, and it's both infuriating heartbreaking to watch...

As I've said before, "too short-sighted, lacking in vision, and divided as a people..." It's our greatest flaw(s) and will inevitably be the death of NL.

BNB said...

I'm sorry Patriot I'll have to wait to finish your article - I read a little and then saw stars. Another piece of fecal matter parading as a journalist. He joins the likes of Marg Wente and Ric Dolphin...

Racism is alive and well and living in Canada.

NL-ExPatriate said...

OMG that is to incredulous to believe?

It isn't the author who is at fault as much as the editors who screened it and allowed it to go to print!

Your right asking this guy for an apology isn't worth the time. Better to spread this far and wide to further highlight how upalong editors are willing to allow their writers to get away with this!

Wince said...

This guy is Scum. Less than Scum. Words can't desribe the anger I feel nor what I'd do to this man if my hands were around his neck.

Anonymous said...


I agree this article is beyond offensive.

I suggest writing to the head of Canoe/Quebecor, Mr. Bruno LeClaire.

His e-mail is: bruno.leclaire@canoe.quebecor.com

Keith Walsh
Kitchener ON

Kevin Strowbridge said...

I say we should all let it go - water off a duck's back, so to speak - and not give this guy any more ratings than he would normally get.

Patriot said...

First, I have since discovered that the original article appeared in the Toronto Sun but was carried by Canoe.

Having said this, both parties are as much to blame in my opinion, but I have updated the story anyway to clarify that.

To Anon: Thanks for the email address and I will indeed be writing.

To Kevin,

I appreciate where you are coming from, but in my humble opinion, we as a people have silently put up with this type of crap for far too long already. If nobody stands up to these sorts of people when and where will it end?

We need to take our image in Canada and throughout the world as seriously as any other culture. If we continue to lie down and take it, we will continue to be kicked like dogs.

WJM said...

How many more examples of bigotry and hatred do NL'ians need directed toward us before enough realize we're not wanted in this excuse for a country???

The switchboard at VOCM doesn't light up when there's a positive article in a Toronto newspaper.

Put things in perspective.

Gordon said...


Ah yes, so I guess Bill Lankhof's "article" just balanced things out. I guess we deserve to be insulted because we didn't kow tow at the correct angle the last time a paper in Toronto said something nice about us. Gee, thanks for putting things into perspective. I really feel proud to be Canadian now.

Gordon said...


By the way, if you had blunted Wankof's piece by referring to the positive article in the Toronto Star ("Newfoundland Curler Rocks"), I might have seen your point to a small degree. The question is, should a journalist engage in using crude stereotypes and cliches in his/her writing? I thought the whole point of increasing literacy in the world was to get away from all that.

Robert McClelland said...

What do you guys expect from the Sun chain of newspapers. They're firmly entrenched up the Conservative's ass. And since Atlantic Canada keeps voting for the Liberals, that makes Atlantic Canada the enemy in the minds of all conservatives.

Anyway, rest assured there are plenty of Ontarians like me who want Newfoundland to remain in Canada. Now when it comes to Alberta, I can honestly say I wouldn't shed a tear if they pissed off.

WJM said...

Ah yes, so I guess Bill Lankhof's "article" just balanced things out.

Not at all, but feel free to keep throwing out straw men to beat up on if it makes you feel big.

The question is, should a journalist engage in using crude stereotypes and cliches in his/her writing?

Absolutely not, and the jerk deserves everything that comes his way.

However, people shouldn't get too exercised; after all, The Independent (among other local news outlets, but they're the worst offenders) spews anti-Canada, anti-Quebec crap all the time, and I don't think anyone upalong pays much attention.

There is a lot of positive stuff printed in the national dailies about Newfoundland and Labrador, but like I said, no one pays attention to the good press.

It's like the sports news; would people rather see a mundane goal, or a guy get wacked in the crotch with a piece of equipment?

Back as you were, to taking stuff out of context and beating up on straw men! Have fun!

no longer proud said...

And the divisiveness continues...

Gordon said...

Commenting on insults doesn't make me feel big at all, just sad.

NL-ExPatriate said...

So he comes back today obviously with the backing and support of the Toronto Sun and it's editors and adds insult to injury.
You must keep in mind that this guy claims to be a satirist and goes as far as to lump himself in with Air Farce, 22 minutes and the like. He even tries to appease some by making fun of himself as if that is going to change what he has put into print
What he is forgetting is that they all keep their satire in context, maybe even with a precursory note of situation.
If he is a sports writer why would he need to bring into question NL's morals and ethics with such issues as the seal hunt, Pogey checks, and the Failing state of our fishery as if we are the only ones to blame?

Wasn't the intent or subject of the comment supposed to be about curling and Brad Gushue winning the berth to represent Canada at the Olympics?
Why the need to degrade, slander, vague innuendo's and the like about all NL'ians and their place in Canada?

Anonymous said...

Hi all

I received a reply from Canoe today saying that that the article has been pulled from their site (I guess at my request?). That still leaves the Toronto Sun to deal with.

Keith Walsh

Kitchener, ON

NL-ExPatriate said...

Don't hold your breath. He adds insult to injury today with his reply. Only this time his sarcasm is alot more vague and veiled. Remember this guy is supposedly a satirist .
You can just see him twisting and turning in his feeeble little sarcastic satirical mind by trying to implicate others and casting blame every which way, reminds you of a little kid who was never taught or learned to take/accept responsibility for his actions. Sad really.
Now the Editors can't plead ignorance either.
Just think of those stand up comics and being on the receiving end in a bar.

BNB said...

My e-mail to Mr. Lankhof and editor:

Hi again Bill,
Better column today than yesterday. Of course explaining the nature of satire to a Newfoundlander is like telling Randy Ferbey how to throw a rock. What comes across in yesterday's article more than satire is your ignorance of Canada's most Eastern Province. You decided an article was due considering the great upset in Curling this year. Then you thought - what do I know about Newfoundland. You could have asked any Hill-Billy in the southern states and they would have came up with the same limited knowledge of N&L that you did. Your first scribbled draft was something like this: "ahhh let's see Newfoundland, ahhh Clubbing Seals, Titanic, Pogey Cheque, Cod, Newfie Screech and whale blubber. Ya that's about it", and then a side note "be sure to use the word Newfie, and if someone calls me up on that I'll say I know someone from "Down-East", so it's OK.

To be fair there was certainly some good satire there. I did like the bit about the victory dance. The problem is that I fully belief your piece is a representation of what most Torontonians know about N&L and that's more sad than funny. Also I'm not sure most people in TO are capable of making the distinction between the satire and the reality when it come to us "Easterners"

Anonymous said...

Why give any credance to this non-entity's puerile rantings?I'd never heard of the jerk until I came across this blog.The Nazi paper Der Sturmer was expert at this type of steotyping.Anyway,satire is where you poke fun at a particular person but to smear a whole group or nation is hate speech.

NL-ExPatriate said...


It isn't so much the writer as the editors who Ok'd the publishing of his rants. It's not like he is a blogger who you have a choice of ignoring but he is a published columnist in a national paper. A nation to which NL belongs for the time being. But for the life of me I don't know why? Wait we were sold down the river by Britain for war debt.

Now were stuck in this Colonial/federalist nation to our detriment.

Newfie Niger said...

First of my apologies to anyone which the N word offends.

Here are the emails of the five controlling MSM outlets in Canada.

fanmail@ctv.ca, ombudsman@cbc.ca, globalnews.tor@globaltv.com, complaints@cbsc.ca, sgraham@cab-acr.ca, bruno.leclaire@canoe.quebecor.com

A rose by any other name is still a rose and hurts just as much when it pricks you.
Hate literature poorly veiled as satire is still hate literature!

Anonymous said...

Well, this is just the way it is. The big Newfie joke.

On the flip side...What goes around comes around.

I invision a Newfoundland in 3-4 years rich from oil revenue, while Ontario/Quebec, etc are in the grip of recession (brought on by high oil prices) and then we can take our turn at crude remarks.

Anonymous said...

We need to make complaints to Canada's Human Rights committee. We as Newfoundlanders constantly face hate speech not acceptable when directed at others.

NL-ExPatriate said...


That what I was looking for Anon.
Here is their web site I will be submitting a compliant soonest.

Harry Boland said...


I told you sorry bastards it was unanimous.

And you didn't believe me.

We're waiting for you...just outside the cave.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...


I told you sorry bastards it was unanimous.

And you didn't believe me.

We're waiting for you...just outside the cave

What ?